I had a blog post all written out for today, but last night I came across Becky's post for a on your heart, on your mind link up and thought "hey I need to do this!" There's been a few things going on that's been on my mind for a while and who knows, maybe another mother might be able to share her advice with me.
Several weeks ago Clay and I were talking to Bryson about his friends. He's never been one to share very much about his day when I go and pick him up from school. He will talk about one little girl in his MDO (they've known each other for over two years and have grown up together at school). But I've noticed when I've seen him in his Sunday School class that he's usually playing by himself. I've never given it too much thought and I don't know if that's bad on my part as a mother.
A couple of Sunday's ago Clay and Bryson had a conversation on the way home from church about his day. Clay had asked B if he played with any of the other kids while he was there and he told him he didn't. Clay asked why and Bryson didn't say very much about it. That afternoon while the boys had gone down for their naps Clay brought up their conversation with me and I decided I would try and talk with him later that evening.
So when it came time to put the boys to bed I went in Bryson's room and we said our prayers and read a book (our normal routine). I asked him if he had played with any of the other kids at church that day and he told me no. I talked with him about some of the boys in his MDO and if he played with them and again he told me no. In the back of my mind I was wondering if maybe he is like me and is shy when it comes to being around new people. Maybe he's not going to be one of those people who feels comfortable going up to someone he doesn't know and introducing himself. And you know what, if that's his personality I'm just fine with that! I'm not going to change who he is. I don't what to change who he is. But, I felt like I did need to encourage him that it was okay to go up to other boys and girls and ask to play with them.
Bryson's reply to me "momma, what if they don't like me?" It took everything I had not to burst out in tears. He's too young to make these kind of statements. He's just a little boy! In that moment I was overwhelmed at what he's going to go through later on in life. The disappointments, the heartbreaks, etc. And as his mother I want to protect him from all of those hurts, but I also know in the back of my mind that it is in those moments he will become stronger.
After our conversation I decided that I would start praying out loud over Bryson before I left his room. I have always gone in and prayed over him after he falls asleep, but I just felt like the Lord was telling me that Bryson needed to hear my prayers for him. I want him to know my concerns and hopes for him.
I'm not sure I handled this particular situation the right way. To be honest I'm not sure there was a right or wrong way. But what I do know is that this situation has taught me how important it is to pray for my children. I'm not always going to be able to protect them from the disappointments life will bring, but I can make sure that I cover my boys in prayer and that they know I'm praying for them not matter what's going on in their lives.
This is so beautiful and brought tears to my eyes when he said that to you. I wrote a similar post last year about my fears of my little girl ever feeling rejection or hurt by her peers. It scares me for whats to come down the road, and that's because we have so much love for our children.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Becky this post brought me to tears. It brought me to tears for we just experienced this this year. See our Kelcee has my heart of gold and her daddy's quiet demeanor and is shy until she warms up to people which is just fine. The teacher says she is one of the most well liked kids in her class and has several friends. At the end of first nine weeks around Christmas time we noticed a difference in our Kelcee. She was not wanting to go to school, she would cry about going to school at night, we knew a lot was seperation anxiety but we also knew it had to be something more. After the hubs snd I talked like you I read her a story we said our prayers and I asked our princess what was bothering her. She was really quiet then she said I don't want to be pretty anore pretty girls are ugly girls. It was all I could do to hold back my tears. She then went on to tell me about a boy who had been picking on her and her beautiful best friend. I was livid at the bullying and immediately brought it to the schools attention. The situation was taken care of and we haven't had anymore issues knock on wood with this child. He is now targeting others which is sad and spit I. This other girls hair. I always will protect my princess and it is so hard to leave then in the hands of others doing school and you did the right thing momma just teach your children they can always come to you and talk to you about anything. I showed Kelcee how to be the bigger person when right after I did a reindeer craft and I so didnt want to give him a reindeer lol kidding but I did and I helped him and prayed for him because obviously he is t getting much love. Later I found out that to be true. For the bday party it was a big one I over did it lol he said I made valentines one even for Kelcee lol that made me chuckle he is being nice he just didnt know how to bit he had to be taught he can't mistreat others and I think the school handled it so well. What worries me is Jel we is so passive that she is a target for she won't tell she has such a big heart and she is so nice like me. I love that about her but I also wish I could protect her heart twenty four seven! I think that's what good mommy's do we worry! You are doing a great job! I felt compelled to share this with you sorry for the novel Summer
ReplyDeleteohhhhh my gosh that made me cry! Jennifer!?! Oh gosh. Don't you sometimes just want to pick our kids up and move to the woods?!? I SO often want to spare my kids heartbreak. I know I can't. It brings me to my knees!
ReplyDeleteI think you did the PERFECT thing. Prayer is ALWAYS a good answer!!!